I really regret the fact that I am not able to work full time, or even part time. I feel like the weakest link unable to contribute financially like I use to. As it is now can just barely make it month to month even receiving SSD monthly benefits, which is a far cry from what I use to earn. Trying to learn how to adjust the last couple of years has been hard. And extra’s have come to a standstill while medical bills take the forefront and that too makes me feel like a burden. The costs of medications, even co-pays adds up each month and also takes a toll.
Taking time to go to the doctor and if I’m not up to driving, I have to have someone else take me so that I’m not a hazard on the road, and that too makes me feel like a burden. Not being able to do the extra things I use to do, like grocery shopping and running errands seems like it was someone else’s life I was living, as it’s a far cry to what I live like now. I use to like being out and about with people, but now crowds give me a panic attack. Also if I drive myself and get astray from my original path, like a detour due to road construction, can set me into a panic attack.
I feel very immobilized and more of a burden than an asset. I try to not let it get me down and for the most part I can control it. Other times when the pain is at it’s worse, its hard to keep those emotions under control, and at times like that I have a meltdown. But I deal with it the best I can and ask for help from my support system when it gets to be too much. That is all anyone can do when dealing with a Chronic Pain Disorder like Chronic Migraine Disease.
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June, Migraine and Headache Awareness Month, is dedicated to Unmasking the Mystery of Chronic Headache Disorders. The Migraine and Headache Awareness Month Blog Challenge is issued by FightingHeadacheDisorders.com.